Are you holding out to “do what you love?” Or, are you learning to “love what you do”?

Recently, I was talking with my two sons about this topic – one is a college senior, the other is in his first job out of college. They both want to “do what they love” but are realizing … they need to be able to make money and survive, too.

We talked about my frame of mind as I started working after college – about the notion of “doing what you love” and pursuing passions. Lots of people put these two statements together. They do seem similar, or close to the same. But I actually see them as two concepts that can be entirely different and, in a way, competing statements.

When I was a fresh-faced graduate, my passions were playing guitar and running. I loved both. But as I got closer to graduation day, I realized something: Most of the successful people I knew didn’t start out “doing what they loved” but somehow they ended up “loving what they did.”

That’s a subtle but strong difference.

It’s more than a difference, I think. It’s a trap. The writer Miya Tokumitsu says this do-what-you-love notion can “sever the traditional connection between work, talent and duty. The vast majority of the world’s workers are not working because they love the job, but instead are simply providing for their loved ones, and they had little choice in the matter.”

But many have found much more in what they do. They’ve found that by showing up, putting in hours, trying hard, and succeeding – that they’ve been able to “love what they do.”

Dirtiest Jobs’ Mike Rowe “would never advise anyone to ‘follow their passion’” until he understands more about the person. “Even then,” he says, “I’d be cautious. Passion is too important to be without, but too fickle to be guided by. Which is why I’m more inclined to say, ‘Don’t Follow Your Passion, But Always Bring it With You.’”

I believe it’s more important to grow into a job or career you love, rather than the other way around. There’s a mindset to adopt here, and I admit, many people never get there. Many are never able to get past the idea of doing what they love. In reality, you can use a love what you do mindset to overcome the challenges you encounter during your career and find great fulfillment.